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SHARE. YOUR. STORY. SERIES. Edition: 1

25 years old. Single. Unexpectedly pregnant. And left feeling alone.

March 11th, 2010, Whitney faced her “what if” fear and gathered up the courage to take the pregnancy test. “ I just stared at it. It was the longest 2 minutes of my life. I watched 1 line appear ….and then 2.”

Living in her friend’s basement in Minnesota and working 2 jobs, she found herself in utter disbelief. As she grasped being pregnant with a baby whose Father she had just chosen to leave, feelings of anger took over.

There she sat thinking, “What happens now? Do I make myself love this man now that he is the Father of my baby?”

Not knowing where to turn, Whitney knew she had to tell her parents that she was pregnant. “Still to this day, it was the hardest thing I have ever done. The conversation was filled with fear, tears, anger, and disappointment. I remember them telling me very matter of fact; that it was going to be hard. That there would be joys and heartbreaks. But that more than anything, they were here to support me.”

As days progressed, Whitney started changing her thought process from “Why” to “Now What”. This meant her travelling back to Iowa, where she could decide on some next steps for not only herself, but now for a baby.

She knew she had to move to Des Moines, where she could be closer to family. This meant figuring out where to live, where to work, getting an attorney, finding an OB doctor, and so much more.

With the support of many, July 2nd, and 5 months pregnant, Whitney boldly left Minnesota to move in with her brother and his family and start her new life in Des Moines.

July 8th, just one week later, she began a job at Wells Fargo. This allowed her to apartment shop, finding a place for her and baby as well as continue her doctor visits. “Everything felt very matter of fact to me. I just kept the mindset that this is what needs to be done for the baby.”

During these months of major transition, Whitney continued to stew over what the role of the Father would look like once the baby was born. Feeling it was sinful to NOT want to be with the baby’s Father, she sought out the advice of her hometown pastor. Once she was confident in her decision to not be with the Father, she got an attorney to take care of legalities and logistics.

Time and advice reassured her that the Father could still be a part of the baby’s life without Whitney being in a relationship with him. “Deciding what the role of the Father would be was one of the toughest parts of the entire pregnancy. As hard as it was, I knew I had to deal with my feelings of anger and focus on making decisions solely based on what is best for the baby. This meant putting my anger aside and attending therapy as well as Child in the Middle classes with the Father.”

…….On November 1, 2010, with the support of Whitney’s Mom in the delivery room, Teegan Danielle Robertson was born. “She is everything I could have ever wanted in a little girl,” says Whitney.

In her first months of being a new Mom, Whitney kept her focus on what would be best for Teegan.

This included her decision to let the Father first meet Teegan when she was 3 months old.

…….As time has passed, Whitney has devotedly accepted the role of Mom. Teegan has had her 1st, 2nd, her 3rd, and soon her 4th birthday. Whitney has continuously worked hard to create a stable home built on faith, support, and love. She has continued her career at Wells Fargo and has met a man that has fully accepted both Teegan and Whitney into his heart. They are to be married this Fall.

Teegan now sees her biological Father approximately 28 hours a week. “It has taken me so much prayer and acceptance to allow Teegan to be with her Father at all. All I can do is preface every visit with….Just be the absolute best you can be for her. I want Teegan to decide for herself what role her biological Father will play in her life.”

When I asked Whitney what her advice would be to someone finding themselves in a similar situation of becoming unexpectedly pregnant and feeling alone, her response was beautifully this:

“First allow yourself to feel. Go through the cycle of emotions that you need to. Cry. Be scared. Be angry. And then get practical and make decisions for the baby. Know it is going to be hard. But also know that you are a part of something greater. And even though life is full of both awesome and hard days, you still get the joy and honor of living out every single one of those days. Your story was written before you were even created. And from your life here on Earth you will have stories to share….but know that your story isn’t really done until you go HOME. Open your heart. And live your story out loud!”

What a joy it has been to share Whitney’s story. With sheer strength and beauty, I am blessed to call her friend. And I am truly blessed to have had the opportunity to document the love shared between this precious mother and daughter.

If you have a story to share [or know someone who would benefit from sharing their story], please, contact me at kerri@kerriphotography.com.

Stories I would love to help share:

  • Living and operating as a wife/husband/mother/father of a service member

  • Homelessness

  • Addictions

  • Dealing and healing with a loss

  • Living with a physical disability

  • Going through mental/physical abuse

  • Rebuilding from personal natural disaster [fire, tornado, etc]

  • Being a parent of a child with an intellectual disability

  • Having a sibling with an intellectual disability

  • Dealing with diabetes, lupus, other diseases

  • Eating disorders

  • An unexpected joy

  • Adopting or being adopted

  • Near death experience

  • Extensive training to reach major goal

  • Moving to a different country

  • Going through a miscarriage

  • Giving birth to a premature baby

  • Turning a dream into reality

  • Rapid weight loss: gaining inspiration and confidence

  • Overcoming a intense fear

 
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